i’m not sure why.

but recently, i know i haven’t been all that great. something is totally off and i can’t place my finger on it. i can not wait till the summer time, until school is over and done with. i can not wait until the things i can look forward to happen. for the longest time, i’ve wanted a tattoo, i really really want a sleeve & chest piece. i know i’ll never get them. why? because society fucking blows. everyone and their grandma has this thing – it’s a code, embedded deep in the skull, stereotyping and placing people into categories.

“if you’ve got a tattoo or piercings all over – then you can’t be normal, you definitely didn’t go to school. you’re pretty much a waste of a life – sorry”

of course, this doesn’t apply to everyone. but almost anyone i know – will agree with that fucking statement. its’ totally unfortunate.

i’m jealous of musicians. you know, you get to create an image for yourself, you can do as you please. of course – you’ve got to be able to pull of the whole music segment. but really, you can be crazy, you can be shy, you can be loud, you can be tatted up, you can wear your ripped jeans, three days in a row if you’d like, you can truly, be you.

— from all that i have seen of musicians. however, please correct me if i’m wrong.

i’ve got the urge to move into the city. get my sleeve and piercings. for the first time in my life, not give a total fuck. not listen to anyone.

i’m almost twenty. sure i’m young as hell. yet i feel damn old.

do you know that i listen to absolutely everything my parents tell me, ask of me?

i love them so damn much.

i’ve got to learn how to do shit on my own.


3 thoughts on “disconnec.t

  1. you cant get a sleeve but you can definitely do something else for yourself,
    even a small little step towards something that you want will bring you closer to your true self.
    everything will seem brighter if you do something very small that doesnt even measure up to the bigger picture but takes as much gut as anything else,
    so i propose we get a piercing or a tattoo on your birthday, even if it’s a 1/4 inch something no one can see or another hold in your ear, something like that can make a big impact on your soul. im ready to sacrifice :p and we wont tell anybody

  2. well, you know what they say…
    after 20 years you’ll regret the wild things you didn’t do, not the ones you did do…

    plus, honestly I can tell you – f**king go for it. people might judge you, but only because they’re shallow. it’s you. your life. your decisions.

    heck, I’ve been wanting a tattoo for a while myself. just haven’t really pushed myself to finally do it. ^^

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